My mother currently lives in independent senior care, which provides additional services like medication assistance, meals, and shuttle services. By her own admission, my mom is no longer comfortable driving her car; she needs someone to drive her to the stores to shop. Because of her short-term memory difficulties, I was also concerned that she might forget about the time or why she was there when she would get to the store. My main concern at this time is to prevent her from being scared, so when she mentioned that she needed a couple of pair of “slacks,” I suggested that we go shopping.
Shopping in the age of covid-19 is very unusual and challenging even for those who are not seniors. Dressing rooms are closed, and the brick & mortar stores have limited inventory. So before I go on, regardless of the political controversies, it is a matter of life or death that seniors need to wear masks. However, for seniors, the mask presents difficulty with fogged glasses and the entanglement of hearing ads; besides, my mom found it difficult to understand me through my mask.
After deciding on a few different styles and colors in the petite section, we asked a sales rep what to do if the pants did not fit. I was surprised to find that stores encourage customers to purchase clothes and try them on at home. If they don’t work out, the customer has six months to return them for a full refund.
We purchased two pairs of pants, which fit well when we returned to my mom’s apartment. However, the length needed to be shortened. At her tallest, my mom’s height was 5’2”. But because osteoporosis runs in her family, she is currently 4’11”. Even though the pants were petite size, they needed to be shortened about an inch.
I come from a long line of sewists. Growing up, I remember my mother would sew many of my clothes. My grandmother was an amazing seamstress; she could see an outfit in a catalog and create a pattern for it in the proper size. She would then sew a similar “copy” of the dress; one of these creations was my mother’s wedding dress. I also remember that my mom and grandmother let me “play” with their sewing machines, doing simple craft projects. And although I did not inherit the true “seamstress” gene, I can hem a simple pair of pants.
This shopping excursion reminded me that there are many levels within one event when caring for an aging parent. Like caring for my children, the event is composed of planning, anticipating challenges, and follow up. The saying“ Everything comes back around” is so true.
